lc23tina's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I missed him...I should have known I would. As much as I said I wouldn't. As much as I swore I wouldn't miss him. As much as I said and I swore, I still missed him. Once he found that out he gloated. Like a mad man at that. I wrote him a note and laid it on his pillow so he would see it first thing this morning. It said: John; I hope you had a good night at work. I love you And just to let you know... I missed you like CRAZY. I got woken up to him saying "good morning baby". Then he crawled into bed. I closed my eyes to drift back to sleep, and he said "so, you really did miss me huh?". I opened my HEAVY eyes again and took a quick look. That man had a HUGE smile. He leaned over and told me that he loved me. I laid there with my eyes closed and waited. I think he thought I was asleep because he waited a long time before saying "I missed you too". HA! he missed me too! It was our first night apart in a little over 3 weeks. He was laid off from work during the holidays because Chryslers shut down. The last day of work before his break I had to call him to come home. That's when I went into the hospital. If I had any doubt in our relationship, it has since vanished. He really proved how much he is willing to do. Not like he HAD to prove anything. When I called him the night I started spotting, he drove like a mad man to get home to me. He stayed by my side the first night in the hospital. He went out of his way to make sure I was comfortable. He even offered to sleep on the floor beside the bed so he wasn't away from me, and that he wouldn't disturb me either. I made him sleep on the bed beside me. The next day when our world decided to crash on us he was my only hand to hold. He went through so much. I hated the fact that everyone paid attention to me. In the hospital I told the Chaplin that I wanted to make sure that John was alright, I wanted someone to ask him for a change. It wasn't just me, it was US. Once no one was in the room. Just John and I, I told him that I loved him, and that I was worried about him too. When John found out I was pregnant he didn't know what to think. It was something we thought was never going to happen. As the days and weeks went by he grew excited. I mean REALLY excited. He would kiss my belly, rub it and talk to it. Sitting in the room with him, knowing that we would never see our baby, knowing everything we knew... He still said he loved me. He cried when we found out our baby had died, he cried when I when I was in pain, he cried when I went into the operating room, and he cried when he first seen me after the D&C. I thought he would run, I don't know why I thought that. But he didn't. He stayed right beside me from start to finish. For 3 weeks he was right beside me. No wonder I missed him last night. HE IS THE GREATEST MAN. And he's mine. 3:23 p.m. - 2003-01-13 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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