lc23tina's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Feeling like yucky poop! I'm feeling like crap again tonight. I am really starting to hate this sick bullshit. I don't like the fact that my heart rate goes thru the roof when I am cleaning my house, and I really hate the fact that I can't even go to bed a night and fall asleep. The hospital should be calling tomorrow for that holter monitor. They better cure me quick, or I'm gonna be one pissed mother @#^%&!. I called Mom's place tonight to see if my sister would come and spend the night. My Mom's concked out this afternoon so that was a no go. I called a friend and asked her to come over but once again when "I" need something she is unable to come thru. This would be the same person who when I asked to come with me the day of my miscarriage, couldn't be bothered. WHY? do I put myself thru that? Friends that are your friends when they need something or have nothing better to do, and aren't your friends when you need someone. Right now, with the condition I am in, I don't want to be alone. I just don't know. John is calling Green Sheild in the morning to see if I qualify for stress/sick leave from work under his plan. If so, I am getting some time off from my doctor. If that's not a possiblity I am going to give up my supervisor position. I just know, I want my heart to start feeling like normal, and my sleep to be uninterupted. Sigh. I wish John were home. 11:11 p.m. - 09.14.03 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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