lc23tina's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Some movies make me cry no matter how many times I watch them. There are some movies that I have seen over and over again. Yet, they still make me ball my eyes out. I hate being this sensitive. Just before John left tonight I started watching Beaches. I have seen that movie at least a million times and it never fails to make me tear up. If you haven't seen it, I highly recomend that you do. It's a chick flick for sure, but even men would like it. So, tomorrow is our first visit with Dr. Day. From what I have been reading it's going to be a long visit. I guess this is where he talks to us and we talk to him and we discuss our feelings about the pregnancy. What if I don't have a feeling yet? I know I am happy but I am also scared beyond belief. I know how scatter brained I have been but a settled thought has not come over me. I am worried that I am not doing anything right. I take my vitamin, I drink my milk, I watch what I eat, but it still feels like I am not doing enough. I am over weight, I am a smoker (which I am trying to boot the habbit for good now), I work insane hours, and I have a stressful home-life. I have a book, I have the internet, and I have people to talk to that have had children and yet I cannot get enough info to make me feel safe with this. Do I tell the doctor this tomorrow, or does he know that everyone is a little scared having their first baby? I know things shouldn't be that scary but they are. I look at so many things, I mean it's not like I am 16 years old and have no clue who the father is. I am 25 years old, I have a job, I have a loving and supportive boyfriend who has a job, I've been with him over a year and I know he is going to be a great father. And yet, I worry. Maybe some of this will be taken off my shoulders tomorrow. Dr. Day has a great way of talking that relieves me. I am the classic pregnant woman. I swear I have every symptom in the book. I have ugly morning sickness (and beyond popular belief morning sickness happens any time of the day), my boobs are sore and even though I never thought I could get any bigger I am starting to get a hard belly, plus I go to the bathroom on average at least 3 times an hour. I didn't think this stuff started happening until further down the road, but with the building pressure of a baby (big or small) it all starts happening early. Most people I have talked to have never even had morning sickness. NEVER! Lucky punks. We already have at least two names picked out, we have no clue if they are going to stick or not. For a girl we have Amy Lynn (Amy- my grandfather's name with whom I share my birth date, but his name was spelled Aimee. Lynn- is R@SE'S middle name). For a boy we came up with Shane Robert (Shane- just a name that I have always liked. Robert- Is John's best friends name). John likes the names, everyone seems to like them too. Well, I better get my butt to bed soon. I will write when I get home to let ya know how we made out with Dr. Day. Night. -T 12:42 a.m. - 2002-11-25 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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